Friday, September 17, 2010

26 weeks down, 14 to go- and lots of random thoughts!

I am down to my 26th week, almost entering into the third and final trimester of the pregnancy. Boy has time really gone by fast and it is continuing to do so. I have been feeling a greater amount of movements, or at least ones with much more powerful kicks to them-it gives a funny tummy flutter feeling, almost like I am riding a roller coaster all the time and it is making my tummy twirl!
 Speaking of roller coasters, it has also been great fun trying to control my emotional rollercoster, and not let it get out of hand. Most of the time I am doing good, but every now and then I break down and start crying, or feel sad for no seeming apart reason-which I am sure hasn't been easy for Michael, thinking that he did something wrong, which of course he hasn't, he really has been so good to me this whole pregnancy and everything in general. He truly is a wonderful helper in this journey, I feel so honored to have him there by my side through this all, I don't know how those women out there that are single or with lacking good husbands do it alone!

Food is finally wonderfully yummy to eat again, it has taken me a while to start really enjoying it again, now the fun challenge is trying to make sure I don't enjoy it too much and over do it!


 On the same note, I have been trying to keep up some kind of exercise whether walking or biking to work/internship to sort of help maintain my sanity and own health- which amazingly makes me feel so much better when I do exercise. I have never really been one to exercise through any phase of my life, so getting into it now has been a great experience.

I was discussing with a friend yesterday the thought that maybe this little girl could actually be a boy.

 I have the thought cross my mind each day, and really wonder how it will turn out. Even though we had the ultrasound and the doctor said, "Probably a girl" I sometimes, many times, can't help but think that her "probably" doesn't sound very reassuring. Don't get me wrong, I am excited either way, and will love it whether it really is a girl, or turns a surprise for us and is a boy instead, but I really can't help but wonder how it will go. I guess the only really true answer to knowing the gender is child birth, but the anticipation for it all is just so much to take sometimes!! okay not really, but either way, I still am very curious to see how it will go!

Cloth or Disposable diapers?


I have been thinking about it a lot lately as well. I know we still have a little while before we will venture into the lovely long pursuit of daily diaper changing, but I have been thinking of the possibilities of it now, in that with our budget, it has been working out great to slowly buy things now, instead of having to spend a bombardment of things in a few months. Which thus brings me to thinking about diapers more, since if we did decide cloth, we could buy them now (at least most of them) and be pretty much set for the diapering years. Of course there are its pros and cons to the different kinds, one is much more expensive, the other is more work, and potentially more mess. One is more safe as far as chemicals go, yet the other is more convenient. I have wracked up quit the pros and cons list for both sides and I guess what it really comes down to is: can I really do it? Can I do it, as in am I REALLY willing to make the commitment of the extra work it could take- it is this little thought process that has kept me from entirely going out and buying the cloth ones, in a fear that I would spend all this money on something that I end up never using...I know some would prob think I am crazy for even making the considerations and would just go all disposable, but there is something about it that keeps me thinking about it....anyway, just more random thoughts.

Memory- memory is a funny thing. I used to think I had a really good memory, and maybe I did. But when they say that there is a "prego-brain" they weren't kidding, at least in my case. Michael thinks I am crazy, but it is amazing to how much I feel like I am forgetting all the time compared to before, and if it wasn't for my handy planner where I write everything down, I am not sure what I'd be doing. Makes me glad I am not taking a semester full of classes where I would have to remember a lot more with homework and assignments! On similar lines as memory, clumsiness.

 I thought that was another crazy pregnancy myth sort of thing that you are more clumsy when you are pregnant, but I am seeing more and more truth to it each day. Luckily I haven't fallen into the clumsy feet trap yet, but my hands are going crazy. It is a weird sensation to feel like you have a firm grip on things and then it seems to magically fall out of your hands all the time- and it is usually food on to my lap- they should make pregnancy bibs. I cant number how many times I drop things out of my hands throughout the day, and it just feels so weird because I feel like I have no control over it when it happens.

I know this post has been full of a bunch of random thoughts...but I guess that's how my days are anyway- So welcome to a little taste of my every days. But overall it has been a sweet and rewarding experience being pregnant. Some days it really isn't easy, and some days it really is scary thinking about it all and what have I really gotten myself into, but at the same time, what an honor it really has been to think that we (as in Michael and I) have the honor and privilege to carry and bring into this world a little life, a little spirit and help them figure out things in this life and be its earthy parents. Maybe in a sense this is my greatest challenge now is taking in the fact that this is really gonna happen and accepting this great honor to be a parent- to REALLY be a parent and to be ready for all the responsibilities that will come with this great privilege. I know things will work out and be okay when it comes down to it, but it doesn't take away from the fact that it is still interesting and challenging to take in. And when it really comes down to it too, our lives will never be the same again, am I ready for this? I hope so, I plan so.